Lately i have been struggling on how to balance work and my submission. i realize that submitting isn't really what you do but about a frame of mind. Madam has finished revamping Her rules and such so i'm hoping that having Her control me more will help me settle down. But most days i just feel like i only have the energy for one or the other and i don't know how to split my mental and physical energies between work and Madam.
i have a hard time coming home from work and just shutting off that aspect of life. i am a nurse in a dementia unit in a care home. i am constantly telling people (mostly the residents) what to do, how to do it and why i want them to do it....repeatedly. It can be emotionally draining. Add to that the fact that i get to thinking about how this is going to be Madam and/or i when we get old. And things happen that i need to vent about and i forget to ask Lee about Her day before doing so.
As much as i know that Lee doesn't mind hearing about my day i feel it is disrespectful to come home and unload my baggage on Her.
If anyone has any tips on balancing submission and work please please please send them my way, i would be forever grateful.
On a happier note, i re-arranged our living room the other day and it turned out fabulous! We now have more distinct office and lounging areas. Also, i think our hunt for a kitchen table and chairs may be drawing to a close. We have found a second hand one online that sounds promising, the only drawback is that it only has two chairs and we wanted 4 for when we have company over for a meal. But we shouldn't have too much of a problem getting 2 more we don't think. So, hopefully one day this week our kitchen will finally look and feel complete.
Have you tried a meditation exercise when you get home. It sounds to me that you need to clear your mindset to neutral in order to be able to allow yourself a submissive focus to your Madame.
ReplyDeleteI found in the past when the worlds distractions didn't leave me be on a level that it would affect play, or my mindset with my partner, I would take a few minutes to clear my head with a breathing meditation exercise I learned when studying karate, at the beginning of each lesson, to clear ones head. I found it works just as well for d/s purpose.