Story Excerpt

Here is an excerpt from a story that I have been writing and going back to now and then over the past year. I wrote this part today after much time of not writing. I hope you enjoy it and I figure you can probably come up with your own idea as to how one could find themselves in this position without My giving the full story:)

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My body has grown stiff from the cold floor and laying unmoving for an unknown amount of time. I have no idea how long I have been locked in this room, the only sign I have of much time passed is the growing pressure I feel in my bladder for release.

A battle rages in my head as I try to decide how it would best please Madam to find me upon her return. Her heel in my back, pressing me to the floor indicated I was not to rise at the time, but was it her intention for me to stay sprawled on the hard floor or would she approve if I were to return to the position I was meant to be in, in the bedroom. I am already to be punished for such a grave disobedience of her command that I fear to make another mistake, but perhaps she would see my changing positions as an attempt to reassert the respect I have for my Madam.

Willing to take on whatever punishment that may come of my decision, I feel in my submissive  self that I must try to show my grief for displeasing her, by once again taking up the wait position for however long she leaves me in this small, lonely room. Moving my stiff body into position, I feel immediately the hardness of the cement pressing into my knees and know that my choice will turn out to be a self punishment and a test of my resolve if she is to ignore me for much longer. I am determined to show my submission.

It doesn't take long for the pain in my knees to grow exponentially. My thigh and calf muscles constrict and tremble as I fight my body on its need to move. My pain is for Madam. I clench my hands to the back of my neck and stare blindly at a spot on the wall as my vision blurs with silent tears that trickle down my cheeks.

I think briefly to distract myself from the fire in my knees by counting, but realize I would then not be fully experiencing my position. I am Madam's property; I have given control of my being to Madam; I am not playing a game, I am living life; to live this life I must be willing to give my all to Madam and do everything that she expects of me. I am nothing; I am no one; I am only what and who she says I am. I choose to feel entirely the pain in my knees, the quivering in my muscles, the ache in my back, the heaviness of my arms, because that is what Madam choses for me.

Instead of counting, I focus all my attention on feeling everything this position causes in my body. It is excruciating for a long time as I slowly scroll through my body, feeling each part, describing out loud how each area is doing, and telling myself the pain is not yet sufficient for the penance I owe Madam.

"Thank you Madam for this lesson; I will learn; I will do better; I want to be your slave and do everything you tell me. Thank you Madam for letting me feel this pain; I want to hurt for your pleasure; I need to suffer for your forgiveness; I beg you to punish me for my insolence. Thank you Madam for allowing this hurt to teach me my place; I am yours; I submit to you; I give you full control; I am yours."

I ramble on until only unintelligible sounds escape and I reach a plateau in my pain where I am kind of floating in a euphoric high based on exhaustion, intense pain, and complete acceptance of what is to come. The way something incredibly hot feels cold to the touch, the feelings coursing through my body have so over stimulated my nerves and pain receptors that I am nearly unaware of my physical discomfort. Not wanting this experience to turn pleasant for me, I slightly alter my position to reawaken my body and fresh tears spill forth as this body that Madam owns once again feels the intensity of pain on a level higher than I have experienced before. I know I am now ready for Madam's punishment.

Not long after, or maybe it is still quite some time later, it is so hard to tell, when my bladder is near bursting, I hear the key in the lock and prepare for Madam's entrance. Not daring to look to the door, with my eyes still fixed to the wall, I hear the click of Madam's heels as she takes the few steps into the room to be directly within my line of sight. I stare at her shoes and realize there is a pair of heavy, black combat boots within my peripheral vision.

Madam has not come back alone.